Dirty whores, horny animals and pretty pink flowers

One of the advanced classes was debating today whether children should be required to help out with household chores. Four of them were suckups and said they should and the other two were honest about it. One girl said that children were too busy studying to do chores, plus "doing work in the house is the mom's job." Before adding, "If I helped my mom clean the house, she would get lazy." I tacked on a couple points to her test score for that gem. Do Korean kids really do that? Their mom asks them to set the table and they turn around and say "Nah, mom, I don't want you to get rusty."

I'm down to about my last 100 days here and while that's not right around the corner, it's enough to get my through almost anything terrible that happens from here on out. As anyone who has even skimmed this blog recently can tell, my opinion of Korea and the culture in general has taken a nosedive in recent months. While I saw friendly, smiling faces when I first got here, now, I see nothing more than the awkward glance, no hint of warmness. I imagine nothing has changed here, the people are still the same, but I've been here long enough to be well past that euphoria of living in a new place. Now I just see Korea for what it really is, and to be honest, it's really a depressing place. Nobody here seems happy. Which is why I'm considering smuggling five of my favorite students in my suitcase when I'm heading home. Kids are happy anywhere, but man, sometimes it's tough for me to look at these kids and not think, man I wish you could grow up somewhere else. What are they doing in school at 10pm? It's freakin child abuse. Pull them out of all these pointless academies, sign them up for a soccer team, maybe teach them what a TV is. This whole society is so warped in what it considers important in life. Yeah it's one thing if working 80 hours a week and torturing your kids is a satisfying experience for you, but all it does here is make Koreans kill themselves.

Whenever we go out and decide to drink an obscene amount at one bar, it always leads to lameness. On Friday, we ordered a pitcher of gin and tonic at this place, because hey, it was only $22. All this did was make me arrange stuffed animals into inappropriate poses and then make awesome song requests, see Nsync's masterpiece It's Gonna Be Me. It was club night at woodstock on saturday, which is weird, because woodstock is not a club. I didn't get there until 2am because I was sleeping until 11pm, but anyway, within 10 minutes of being there, this really short Korean girl started dancing with me. I think she was just like "Oh foreigner, this will be funny". But it was weird because I'm not sure how you dance with really short girls. Are you supposed to come down to their level or just let them lick your nipples for a half hour?

I almost forgot that there was one really funny part about last Friday night and of course that happened at McDonalds. I went in to get a massive and Bender, like usual, pretended he didn't want it and started walking back to my place. 30 seconds later, he walks back in with what can only be described at the grossest Korean ever, and man, that's saying a lot. The picture above with her hand moving up his leg doesn't capture the nastiness. She only had two teeth. That's not a joke. She might have been a whore, but Bender didn't have enough money. She asked us if we were gay, and I don't know why, but I have never answered No to that question in my life. So I said sometimes and then told her Bender likes little boys. I believe in the photo Bender is trying his best to explain that he doesn't in fact like little boys, and instead prefers them to be around 15 or 16. When we got back to my apartment, I smeared sausage and egg all over my body...

We're heading to Busan this weekend, which is 3 hours south of Seoul on the bullet train, which apparently goes 7000 mph. Staying at a place on the beach, which should be a nice appetizer for Thailand in a couple of weeks. However, we booked a $56 hotel and my confirmation email said "Reserved 1 Twn" Now if twin stands for one twin bed in our room, I suspect I will no longer be an anal virgin after this weekend.